What does Asia think?

There have been a couple of experiences that has changed the way I "handle" Asia. Asia always seemed like she was "in there", that she was fairly normal just couldn't talk. She sure can make tempers flare. As parents, siblings, friends, extended family and  possibly a stranger here and there-she can be naughty and it's is so frustrating to all. I have to watch her when we go out, I worry she will hit a passerby or pull everything off of a supermarket shelf. She may throw a brand new fountain drink on the floor of a restaurant or worse, try to swipe everything off of the table-all glass dishes and food included (all of which she has accomplished). Strangers stare and give those looks of "disgust". I get looks when she is naughty and I get looks for trying to make her happy. I often try to keep her calm by telling her she can have whatever she wants-saying yes to this and yes to that-people think I am creating a "spoiled brat". Crazy thing is, saying yes to Asia rarely calms her down. I would love to know what is going on in her head. She says "book"-yes "mall"-yes "Donald's"-yes...and she still tantrums? We don't understand why she does certain things or acts a certain way. I don't see myself as a mean or angry person, I am generally very laid back, patient and caring but Asia flips that switch sometimes. A few months ago I took a step back and didn't like what I saw in myself. She was infuriating me and Asia has gotten her fair share of time-outs, scoldings, and a swat here and there (not easy to admit). Knowing what I do now, I feel a bit brokenhearted that I couldn't be more patient and a little guilty. When it's 24/7 without many breaks-it wears you down and I lose it. Asia is a angel and that is why I am trying to figure it all out. This year was my first "change of heart" when dealing with these struggles daily-I try to think that "there must be a reason for her actions" and try to be more patient. The following story is something that really touched my heart- a lot of people have seen it but, it is so amazing to me and maybe it will be to someone else.